I’ve never been the best at delivering news.
Good or bad, there’s always a sense of pressure and responsibility to get it right. How a person receives the news can depend solely on the way you present it to them. Some like to be eased into the news with something smaller and less impactful until finally, the big reveal. Others may prefer to just rip the band-aid off and get it over with.
I’ve had my preferences in the past, but nothing could ever prepare me for what I had just heard.
No one had spoken for a while. We just sat there in a circle at the dining room table. Every now and then someone would shift in their seat or tap their foot.
This is stupid, why am I letting them waste my time? It’s not like it’s true.
I glanced at them expectantly. They exchanged looks but no one gave in.
“Well,” I said, losing patience.
There was another pause.
” Look, if no one’s gonna say anything then I might as well leave, I don’t know why I’m wasting my time.”
Another pause. I sighed and scooted my chair back. “Exactly what I thought.”
When I moved to stand, Jullian grabbed my hand.
“Wait, please,” he said. I stared at him, then at his hand gripping my arm. I contemplated leaving.
“Look,” he started, ” we know how it sounds and you must be crazy out of your mind confused, but everything she said is true.”
“Are you going to show me, or not,” I removed my arm from his hold and crossed them over my chest.
Back in the room, after many failed attempts to explain and convince me, they promised to show me these so-called ‘powers’ they had. So far all I’ve seen are excuses and red flags. I know I should have left a long time ago but something was pulling me to stay.
“Okay,” was all he said, then began to remove his jacket.
“Jullian, wait,” Anessa stood. “I don’t think this is a good idea.”
“She has to see it to believe us, Ness.”
The rest of the group listened quietly, visibly stressed. “That’s just it, why would she have even been in that lab if she didn’t have powers, or at least know about them. I don’t trust her. What if she’s working for them? What if they knew we were coming, and wanted us to find her?”
Jullian ran his hands through his hair. “She’s not.”
“You don’t know that.”
“Yes I do.”
“No, you don’t! For all any of us know she could be leading them to us. They could be on their way right no-“
“SHE’S NOT!” Jullian yelled, slamming his hands down on the table. His arms were glowing a bright reddish orange, melting through the table cloth and sinking into the metal upon contact.
” She. Is not. One of them.” For a second, his eyes glew a goldish red color but he blinked it away before I was sure.
I stepped back, having jumped out of my seat from Jullian’s outburst. There was a small moment of silence, then someone spoke.
“Jullian, you know I’m the last person to ever agree with Anessa, but she kinda does have a point.” Kenji explains carefully, leaning forward in his chair. “Seriously why would she be there, the only person there, if she had no clue about any of this.”
“I’m with Jullian,” Anthony said abruptly. It’s the first time I’ve heard him speak since the fire. He leaned back in his chair with a relaxed expression. His arms rested in the pockets of his hoodie.
He seemed calm, unbothered almost.
“Yeah, of course you are,” Anessa snapped.
He pulled his hands out of his pockets and ran them through his hair. “If she wanted to kill us she’s had plenty of time. Also from the moment I found her in the lab her emotions have been genuine. So unless she’s the world’s best actor, she’s telling the truth.”
Another pause.
This can’t be happening. They’re treating me as if I’m not right in front of them. As if I’m not a human being with thoughts, opinions, and emotions capable of speaking for myself.
“Hey, I don’t know if any of you have the “power” of common sense but let me make one thing clear. I was brought here unwillingly. I didn’t ask to be saved out of the fire that hot hands here caused, I didn’t ask to be brought into the middle of the woods with a group of freaks who lack the basic instinct of calling for help, and I didn’t ask to know about your super not so secret super powers. Everything that has lead to this moment was because of you guys. And now you sit here in my face and discuss whether or not I can be a threat to you. Unbelievable. If you don’t want to help me that’s fine. I can find my own way home.”
I didn’t wait for a reaction or a response. I stormed to the room where I had first been, snatching up my clothes and rummaging through them hoping to find my phone, wallet, or literally anything to get me out of here.
I could hear footsteps approaching the room, followed by a soft knock at the door. I gave a quick glance not stopping my movements. Standing in the frame was the last person I thought would come to check on me.
Anessa quietly moved through the room taking a seat on the edge of the bed.
“Listen,” she started.
“No, I don’t care and it doesn’t matter. I’m leaving.” Realizing my search was becoming a lost cause I switched my focus on putting on my shoes.
As I reached for one of the strings, a subtle ache in my arm made me gasp in pain. I checked the offending area and a thin streak of blood streamed down to my elbow.
Shoot. My chip, I completely forgot to change it.
I moved quickly to the bathroom and held my arm up to the mirror inspecting the area. Anessa followed behind curiously. Fighting through the pain and discomfort, I found the chip had been broken into separate pieces. I felt around the area softly searching for the entrance.
The bleeding had most likely come from a cut from one of the broken pieces. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath preparing myself mentally for what had to be done. Blood wasn’t as much of a problem for me but pain made me queasy.
I attempted to reach into the hole with my fingers but it was too small. Next, I tried to squeeze it out like a pimple but after a few moments of bearing the pain it was no use. I shakily searched through draws and cabinets mentally done with everything that has been happening.
“What are you doing?” Anessa asked.
“I need tweezers do y’all have them?” I asked, turning to face her.
“Uhh yeah, they’re in Kenji’s room, hold on.” She said turning and walking out of the bathroom.
I turned on the cold water running it on my hands before gently applying it to the sore spot on my arm. Sighing at the relief, I sat on the toilet leaning over onto the counter. If bad luck was a job I’ve hit overtime long ago.
Annesa returned with the tweezers, along with Jullian, Kenji, and Rosemary. She handed me the tweezers and stood next to me as I moved back to my place in front of the mirror.
“Hey, are you okay, what’s going on?” Jullian asked softly as he moved to my other side.
” I need to use these tweezers to get something out of my arm.” I responded simply.
I held my arm up in an uncomfortable position that gave me a clear view of the hole. With shaky fingers I raised them gently, wiggling my way through searching for the first piece. I did my best to hide the pain but there was no use. I brought the tweezers down gripping the counter in an attempt to steady myself from the pain.
“Let me help you.” said Jullian reaching for the tweezers but I snatched them away.
“I got it.” I said sharply. ” I can do it on my own. I don’t need your help and I don’t need an audience.” I said the last part looking over my shoulder for the others to hear.
They filed out one by one mumbling, leaving Jullian, still standing next to me watching.
Again I raised the tweezers to my arm poking through the hole unable to get a grip on the chip. I must have pressed a nerve because a sharp pain tensed my arm and I brought the tweezers down again yelping in pain.
After a short moment of steading myself I once again began to raise the tweezers. This time Jullian stopped me, forcing my hand down to the counter firmly.
“Seriously Gwynn, I’ll do it.” He looked at me through the mirror with those freaking eyes again. Hearing him say my name for the first time almost made me consider his offer. No, No. I can handle myself.
I glared at his reflection and attempted to lift my hand but he wasn’t budging. I turned to see him face to face. “Move your hand.” I said impatiently.
“No.” he replied, looking down at me. I could almost see a smirk hiding in his expression. A ‘your not gonna win this so just give up’ expression.
I rolled my eyes, “Fine. Just do it fast.”
The pain in my arm was growing too quickly for a cat and mouse over tweezers. He revealed the hidden smirk and grabbed the tweezers from my hand. He placed his palm on my waist pushing slightly, motioning me to sit on the toilet again. I complied, ignoring the butterfly fireworks party going on in my stomach.
He cupped my arm in one hand and held the tweezers in the other. With a focused expression he pushed them into the now bruised area. I inhaled, biting my lip and turning away. He raised his eyes noting my response and spoke to distract me from the pain.
“I apologize for scaring you earlier. I can be an idiot sometimes.”
“It’s cool.” I said shakily, almost shedding a tear as he removed the first piece.
“Aren’t you gonna apologize?” he asked, placing the shard on the counter and going back in for the next.
“For?” I questioned raising an eyebrow.
“You called me a name back there and it was pretty offensive. What was it again? Oh yeah… Hot hands.” He chuckled softly, pulling out the next piece.
“I’m not apologizing for that.” I scoffed.
“Okay then, I won’t apologize for what I called you.” he smiled to himself waiting for me to ask.
I took the bait. “And what did you call me?”
“Pretty.”
We stared at each other for a moment and I could swear you could hear my heartbeat. I wasn’t used to getting compliments from guys, especially wildly attractive superpower possessing ones.
Our moment was broken as he removed another piece from my arm. “Ow!” I groaned.
“And that was the last one.” He began cleaning and wrapping my wound with the bandages Kenji had brought.
“By the way what, exactly, did I remove from your arm?” He continued bandaging, watching me curiously as I answered.
“It’s my Insulin. I have diabetes and I use that chip to monitor and regulate my blood sugar. I only change it out every three days but I’m guessing this one broke with everything that happened in the fire.”
“Oh, I’m sorry about that. Luckily Kenji specializes in this stuff. He has the power to instantly learn and understand the workings and mechanics of anything, regardless of how simple or complex. He should be able to fix or recreate your chip for you.” He stood and walked to the door leaning his top half out of the frame and called for Kenji.
“You know I have more at my house right, I can get another there.” He walked over to the sink and began washing the tweezers and his hands.
“You were kidnapped, remember. Do you think it’s safe enough to go back there?”
Kenji walked in and sat on the counter. He scooped some water from the faucet and threw it at me, the water splashing in my face.
“I’m sorry for considering the fact that you could be an evil spy sent to kill us all.” He pouted, dragging his words like a child.
I wiped the water from my face and decided to ignore his apology.
“Kenji, do you think you can fix this? It’s her insulin chip for her diabetes.” Jullian grabbed a towel hanging on the shower rack and scooped up the shards, handing them to Kenji.
He eyed the contents carefully. Moments passed and not a word was said.
“I thought you said his powers were instant.” I said mockingly looking at Jullian.
“My power is called Intuitive Aptitude and yes, it’s instant. It’s just, I have good news and I have bad news.”
We waited patiently for him to continue.
“Good news. I can fix this device. Bad news, this is not an insulin chip.”
“What do you mean this isn’t an insulin chip?” I got up from the seat and stalked over to Kenji. I took the pieces and shaped them together. “Look at it again.”
He raised his eyebrows and opened his eyes cartoonishly pretending to reexamine the chip. “Nope. Still not insulin.” He shrugged his shoulders and turned to Jullian. “You said this was an insulin chip.”
“Because it is.” I interjected. ” I’ve been using them for as long as I can remember. I switch them every three days and go to the doctor every month. They give me a mental and physical evaluation and take my blood. Then I get my dose of insulin.”
They shared concerned looks. “What kind of evaluations?” Jullian asked.
“Mental and physical. You know, like when they ask you the questions, Do you hear voices? Do you feel weird when touching another person? How long until you feel a tingle in your hands?” I tilted my head as their expressions changed from concerned to fearful.
“Gywnn those are not normal procedures for a diabetes check up.” Kenji said slowly. “This chip has an injection piece similar to the collars in the holding prison and I believe it may have been filled with a poison to possibly suppress your abilities.”
He looked at Jullian. “That could explain why she was at the lab? And why she doesn’t know about powers.”
“I’m sorry, what?” I breathed. Feeling lightheaded.
“Gwynn-” Jullian started, but I cut him off.
“No, stop talking.” I exited the bathroom and made my way towards the front room. This is not happening. I have diabetes. I’ve had it my whole life.
I stumbled through the halls, my mom’s voice repeating in my head “every three days we need to switch the chip.” I retraced my doctor’s visit. Every month the same questions. Again my mothers voice “every three days, switch the chip”.
I can’t take this anymore. I need to leave. Ever since I’ve gotten to this house, shit has just been piling up. I picked up my pace and started running to the door. I could hear everyone’s calls behind me but ignored them.
I burst through the doors not even attempting to glance behind me. It was raining and dark out but I paid no attention as I trudged through the muddy woods.
I sprinted through the trees constantly tripping over roots and branches. Lungs burning, vision blurry, my legs begging me to stop but I urged on. I may not know where I’m going but I have to get away. Those people are crazy. I can’t be like them. I’m not one of them.
They couldn’t possibly be telling the truth…..
could they?
Anarchism and Other Essays